The pros and cons of social media for teenagers have been a hot topic for years. While it's great to stay connected, often certain aspects of social media can impact teens negatively.
Kerry Krautwald Joslin, LCSW, is a Program Director of the Brief Strategic Family Therapy Program and a therapist in School Based Clinical Services at Acenda. She offered her thoughts and insight into the affects of social media on teens, what parents should look out for when monitoring screen time, and how to help teens through unhealthy relationships with social media.
Is there such a thing as “healthy” social media use?
When faced with the numerous dangers of social media, it can be difficult to know whether there is a healthy way to engage with platforms. Moderation can help in reducing the negative effects of comparison and addictive algorithms, but a more active awareness of the content your teen consumes is critical.
“Social media has the ability to be extremely influential with the messaging it conveys to teens,” Krautwald Joslin said. “Teens could be viewing content that encourages self-love, acceptance, exploration of hobbies, and healthy connections. Or they could be viewing content that encourages body shaming, violence, inadequacy, and cyberbullying.”
Take the time to discuss the nuances of social media algorithms with your teen to ensure that they understand the risks of engaging with negative or unhealthy content. Challenge the way they use social media by discouraging “doom-scrolling” and encouraging intentional decision-making when choosing creators and content to follow.
What are teens feeling when scrolling through social media?
Whether it's Instagram, Snapchat, or TikTok, social media users are likely to feel a rollercoaster of emotions as they scroll through their newsfeeds. Social media can be a great escape to have a laugh or check in on friends, but along with the positives come negative feelings.
Exclusion: Imagine a teen checking their social media and they see a Snapchat story of all of their friends at a party that they weren't invited to. It's not a great feeling. Not being included in certain activities can hurt as it is, but having to see how much fun others are having certainly doesn't help.
Comparison to others: One major drawback of social media is the constant comparison to others. Whether physically, financially, or socially, a teen will immediately compare their lives to others. This can lead to body dysmorphia and eating disorders, acting out or substance abuse, depressive episodes, and more. Photo editing software and filters create a false sense of reality on social media, and that in turn, lessens teens' confidence as they compare themselves to an unrealistic standard. It's not only comparing lives on social media, but it's also measuring someone's worth through the number of likes they receive.
FOMO (Fear of Missing Out): According to studies, teens can average 2 to 9 hours of screen time a day. It's the first thing they do when they wake up and the last thing they do before bed. Social media has ingrained itself into teenage culture, and it often feels like you're missing out if you're not constantly checking your accounts. Teens may be distracted or rush through homework to regain access to their devices.
Signs of Clinical Concern
Comparison and judgement are critical to creating your own identity as a teenager. However, comparison can also be used against you to encourage engagement and dependence on your follower count or likes to measure your value. As a parent, it can be tough to decipher when your teens’ behaviors move into more clinical concerns.
Krautwald Joslin suggested keeping an eye out for the following signs when judging your teens’ relationship with social media:
- Lack of interest in usual activities or things they used to enjoy
- Increased isolation
- Concerning reactions when asked to turn off or put away social media devices
- Negative comments or self put-downs, comparing themselves to others at a high rate
- Significant mood changes
- Difference in eating habits
- Obsession with obtaining more “likes” or followers
If your teen displays a combination of the signs above, it may be time to consider seeking professional counseling to help them through their struggles.
How can parents help protect teens?
It's natural for caretakers to immediately want to jump in and shield their child from the world, but coming on too strong or strict may be harmful in the long run. Here are 3 suggestions to protect your teens from the cons of social media:
- Set reasonable limits: Encourage your teen to turn their devices off completely before bed and make a rule that there are no phones at the dinner table. A recent statement from the US surgeon general states research has shown that adolescents age 12-15 who spent more than three hours per day on social media face a heightened risk of experiencing poor mental health outcomes compared to those who spent less time online.
- Monitor their accounts: Check in to see what your teen is posting on social media. Check in often to see how they're feeling and make sure their posts are appropriate.
- Have open conversations: Having an open dialogue about the pros and cons with your child is essential for your teen to have a healthy relationship with social media. Make sure they know that many images and profiles are unrealistic and share your own social media habits.
It can difficult to find the balance between monitoring your teen’s social media usage while also offering them independence and freedom as they move into young adulthood. Krautwald Joslin said, “Parents should be transparent on an ongoing basis with children about their concerns, expectations and monitoring when it comes to social media usage. Highlight or frame this as coming from a place of love, a desire to keep them safe (just like in all other areas in life) and to teach a healthy relationship with social media.”
This balance between freedom and safety can look like:
- Setting time limits on screen time or social media apps
- Preventing access to social media overnight
- Setting all accounts to private and turning off direct messaging capabilities
Providing your teen with room to grow while protecting them from the potential dangers social media poses gives them room to develop a healthy relationship with social media.
Acenda's Mental Health Library has many resources to help get the conversation started about social media and teens:
Going Analog: Breaking Up with Your Digital Habits
Building Healthy Habits with Social Media
Digital Detox: Creating Healthy Technology Boundaries
Gen Z, Mental Health, and the Pursuit of Balance
It is important to note that a lot of the pressure to keep kids off social media or to regulate what they are consuming falls into the responsibility of the parents and/or guardians. U.S. Surgeon General Murphy also said, "This is not going to be an issue that we solve with one sector alone," and policymakers and technology companies hold much of the responsibility. We hope that we can simply provide some guidance on how to establish healthy technology boundaries at home.
If you are concerned about your child's mental health, clinicians at Acenda's Child & Teen Counseling Services are here to help.
About the Authors
Kerry Krautwald Joslin, LCSW, is the Program Director of Acenda’s Brief Strategic Family Therapy (BSFT) program, where she oversees a team of therapists working to mediate interventions to change interactions and create a healthy family units. She also works as a therapist with Acenda and has served the agency for more than 10 years.
Riley de Jong, the Content & Engagement Strategist with Acenda’s Brand, Marketing & Engagement team, attended the University of California – Los Angeles for her undergraduate degree in Communication and minor in Entrepreneurship. She enjoys supporting her community, telling engaging stories, and connecting with others.
